We need to stop taking dating apps so seriously. It’s technology, not magic.
Most of us know at least 1 couple who met online. As a result, when someone says, “Dating app algorithms,” we subconsciously hear, “Dating app gods.”
So many of us don’t really know how our tech works. Therefore, when the marketing teams of these dating app companies tell us they have the power to help us find the one, we believe them.
I’ve spoken to people who’ve told me they never delete their dating apps because they’re afraid of missing out on their one true love.
Isn’t that sad? To feel like you can never take a break because if you do, something you really want, will miss you.
I don’t want that for you. Especially because it’s not true. Dating apps are basically lines of code, with a dash of artificial intelligence, learning your patterns and habits. That’s it.
There is no magical algorithm that knows you better than yourself. You still have to:
do the on and offline work
chat with matches
go on dates
be vulnerable
build and move the relationship forward (along with your partners)
Sure, it's less romantic to think of your favourite dating app as an introduction service. Yeah, it would be awesome to enter some data and have an algorithm help you find the one; but when the stakes are so high, so is the pressure. It’s really hard to enjoy the journey when you’re under so much pressure.
xoxo,
Bridget
The Dating Doula
